This is the story of a girl....

So, Becky had so much to share with us this evening. Thoughts on marriage and car trouble.

So Becky and I were sitting there, along with her lovely roommates, and we got to talking about life, the universe, and pretty much everything. In the course of this discussion, Becky suddenly started talking (no one knows why--maybe because we're going to be in Vegas this weekend for the BYU game) about Vegas marriages. And I quote: "I wonder if there is any problem with getting married for a weekend, not doing anything about it, and then getting it annulled a week later??" So maybe it's a loose quote, but the meaning was all the same in her words. She continued to pontificate on the topic for a while (much to our amazement) and we even had to have Chelsea call her mother to get an authoritative statement on the legitimacy of a weekend or week long marriage by an Elvis impersonator. Needless to say, I think my cheeks were sore before too long.

A bit later, we drifted away from the topic of marriage (which, I assure you, I am fully under-qualified in...but if you are female and have questions, I am always willing to discuss it. I have applications available in my office. This is the meaning of the word facetious) and soon found ourselves enjoying pleasant conversation yet again. Until suddenly Becky began to share with us the greatest tragedy of the semester thus far. Hypothetically speaking, (in order to protect the feelings and well-being of the persons involved) there was a girl that had a nice new car, which she loved like her own child (which she doesn't have yet). Also hypothetically speaking, there was another car somewhere on the street or parking lot, basically somewhere in the way of this hypothetical girl and her hypothetical car. And all these hypothetical things met each other in a most unfortunate way, such that the hypothetical girl's beloved vehicle gave itself a rather significant boo boo on the bumper and she had to leave a long, lugubrious note (o.k., so maybe I made up the long, lugubrious part) for the other hypothetical person whom the other hypothetical car belonged to.

Now, you may think this is the end. But it's not. She cried a river and drowned the whole world over this next incident. You see, this hypothetical girl once was driving down the street, and before she realized it saw the surprised body of a young man rolling off her hood. She was scared, and feared for his life. So she stuck her head out the window, yelled "are you o.k.?," saw that he was not bleeding profusely, and so drove off without receiving an answer to her question. So Becky shared this with us, and we all sat there, trying to replay this image in our minds, trying hard not to laugh.

In any case, Graham Cracker, whose name will remain thus in this record until he decides what his real name is, kindly informed Becky that this probably means that she'll be heading south on judgement day. Not much more than two minutes later, he postulated that this could have been the best thing she ever did, since if she had stopped, she would have been sued for all she's worth, and their family would be on the street and she'd be groveling about in trash cans instead of going to college with us. At this Becky became very confused, and rightly entreated Graham Cracker that he not be so extreme in opposite directions. All in all, I think we successfully put her fears and worries to rest based on the fact that repentance is possible.

So we had a great conversation. Needless to say we are all better people because of it. I hope one day she'll realize what a good example of what not to do she is. Don't get married in a week, don't hit pedestrians and run. She also had this very important insight while we were sitting there talking--said she, "my feet reek."

So the moral of the story is, always carry a tape recorder with you just in case you think you may have an interesting conversation. I think I'll do that next time.