I woke up this morning to find myself in reality, after having dreamed that I was cornered by a velociraptor from Jurassic Park in my bathroom tub. Having considered making a run for it down the hallway and leaping from the balcony, I gave up hope and was preparing myself for a gory death. Then I woke up. Quite nice, I thought--and also fitting with the holiday.
I didn't really have a costume made up for today--I went to class and work wearing my "Front Row Fanatics" shirt from last year--I figured that was enough to inspire fear in most of the rest of the Mountain West Conference, at least. I considered dressing up like Tiger Woods for a while, then decided that I'm just too good looking to pretend to be him.
So I ended up just wearing my 'ie lavalava again. Except this time not bearded and without Chelsea's ukulele--it was in her room, and I'm not allowed to go in there, because that would be scandalous and against the honor code.
In all, I feel that Halloween would indeed be much more interesting if we confused everyone by handing out candy door to door rather than receiving it. It would be a shock wave of change--first we would give people candy door to door, then they would be stuck with too much candy on their hands. Just like in the book "If you give a mouse a cookie," they'll naturally start having to hand their own candy out. This pattern would reciprocate until it fills the whole world with people handing out candy. What an amazing revolution it would be! That's all.
Wednesday, October 31
The beer shark
Sunday night was full of excitement for me. I walked out onto the balcony and found a shark there. And not just any shark--it had some sort of beer name logo stamped to it's side, showing clearly that it must have been branded as part of some sort of marketing gimmic that was doomed to fail in Provo, and thus found it's way to our balcony.
So I threw the shark at M10. The only unfortunate thing is that the shark had fins, which hinder its forward motion. So it got stuck in the tree. At the top. I was not tall enough.
To make a long story short, I scrambled all around the tree trying to save the poor beer shark. I even went to the point of trying to get it down with the snow shovel I saw in our stairwell. But alas, that was not enough. I finally was able to recruit Brandon's help, and by standing on his shoulders, steadying myself on the tree limbs, and reaching upwards, exerting my tender little efforts to reach it, I was able to grab the hapless creature from its undeserving and uncomfortable fate. After which I attacked people with him. Along with Freddie.
In all, I think we were a success. I got several people with direct hits, and they can now all attest that they were attacked by a beer shark. The end.
And also the throwing of the beer shark followed by crazy pictures.
So I threw the shark at M10. The only unfortunate thing is that the shark had fins, which hinder its forward motion. So it got stuck in the tree. At the top. I was not tall enough.
To make a long story short, I scrambled all around the tree trying to save the poor beer shark. I even went to the point of trying to get it down with the snow shovel I saw in our stairwell. But alas, that was not enough. I finally was able to recruit Brandon's help, and by standing on his shoulders, steadying myself on the tree limbs, and reaching upwards, exerting my tender little efforts to reach it, I was able to grab the hapless creature from its undeserving and uncomfortable fate. After which I attacked people with him. Along with Freddie.
In all, I think we were a success. I got several people with direct hits, and they can now all attest that they were attacked by a beer shark. The end.
And also the throwing of the beer shark followed by crazy pictures.
Sunday, October 28
A walk in the moonlight
So the past few days have been very interesting--and I feel inspired to share my experiences with you all (meaning the few of you who actually know about and read my posts). So first off, I successfully attended M11 and 12's Halloween party the other night. I didn't have a costume, but I did have an 'ie lavalava, as the Samoans call it, and Chelsea had a ukulele. Melanie taught me how to play a song. The rest of the night is history, between the crazy dancing, limbo games and ukulele strumming. Let's just say I had a good time of it. Not to mention that I went on a walk in my 'ie lavalava, strumming the ukulele and looking up at the nearly full moon with an aura of light all around it. We must have looked like quite the motley crowd walking around Provo looking at the moon with a man in a lavalava with his ukulele strumming away.
Friday, October 26
Priorities of Life
So, due to some recent events, I feel it important to list for all to see the most important things in life. Please do not question the validity of them--just trust me.
MOST IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE:
1. The Gospel
2. Family
3. Sleep
4. Everything else
Notice that everything is the last thing on the list, after sleep especially. If you are one of those kind of people that puts schooling and work first, I have pity on your soul, since your life will probably be very confusing. I pray repentance upon you.
PS--obviously, the importance of making this list of priorities known is not among the category "everything else," otherwise I would be getting sleep at the moment. So next time someone says "sleep isn't the most important thing in life," remember---only the gospel and family are more important. And don't forget it! (and posts about how important sleep is).
MOST IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE:
1. The Gospel
2. Family
3. Sleep
4. Everything else
Notice that everything is the last thing on the list, after sleep especially. If you are one of those kind of people that puts schooling and work first, I have pity on your soul, since your life will probably be very confusing. I pray repentance upon you.
PS--obviously, the importance of making this list of priorities known is not among the category "everything else," otherwise I would be getting sleep at the moment. So next time someone says "sleep isn't the most important thing in life," remember---only the gospel and family are more important. And don't forget it! (and posts about how important sleep is).
Monday, October 22
Homework Shmomework
I should be doing my homework at the moment...but I'm not. I've decided to be completely responsible and schedule my homework for another time. Such as tomorrow morning and most of the evening as well.
Life is pretty good...in pretty much all areas of life. I'm getting raises at work, my friends all seem to like me, and despite the fact that I am putting off homework at the moment, my classes are doing quite well, and I have very few complaints.
As far as recent thoughts and quotes, none have stuck with me long enough to merit posting. This page is about quality, not quantity, and I'm not going to just post anything on a whim. This reminds me of my few new favorite words--whims, whimsical, bohemian, and eclectic. What a mix.
In any case, I have nothing more to add to the moment, and I had better move on with my life instead of pondering on my lack of ponderings and go have an experience worth writing about.
Life is pretty good...in pretty much all areas of life. I'm getting raises at work, my friends all seem to like me, and despite the fact that I am putting off homework at the moment, my classes are doing quite well, and I have very few complaints.
As far as recent thoughts and quotes, none have stuck with me long enough to merit posting. This page is about quality, not quantity, and I'm not going to just post anything on a whim. This reminds me of my few new favorite words--whims, whimsical, bohemian, and eclectic. What a mix.
In any case, I have nothing more to add to the moment, and I had better move on with my life instead of pondering on my lack of ponderings and go have an experience worth writing about.
Monday, October 15
Notable Quote
"I'm sorry, I was just trying to be mean, but I can't! I'm such a loser!!!"
(Bran Muffin)
(Bran Muffin)
Saturday, October 13
Wednesday, October 10
This is the story of a girl....
So, Becky had so much to share with us this evening. Thoughts on marriage and car trouble.
So Becky and I were sitting there, along with her lovely roommates, and we got to talking about life, the universe, and pretty much everything. In the course of this discussion, Becky suddenly started talking (no one knows why--maybe because we're going to be in Vegas this weekend for the BYU game) about Vegas marriages. And I quote: "I wonder if there is any problem with getting married for a weekend, not doing anything about it, and then getting it annulled a week later??" So maybe it's a loose quote, but the meaning was all the same in her words. She continued to pontificate on the topic for a while (much to our amazement) and we even had to have Chelsea call her mother to get an authoritative statement on the legitimacy of a weekend or week long marriage by an Elvis impersonator. Needless to say, I think my cheeks were sore before too long.
A bit later, we drifted away from the topic of marriage (which, I assure you, I am fully under-qualified in...but if you are female and have questions, I am always willing to discuss it. I have applications available in my office. This is the meaning of the word facetious) and soon found ourselves enjoying pleasant conversation yet again. Until suddenly Becky began to share with us the greatest tragedy of the semester thus far. Hypothetically speaking, (in order to protect the feelings and well-being of the persons involved) there was a girl that had a nice new car, which she loved like her own child (which she doesn't have yet). Also hypothetically speaking, there was another car somewhere on the street or parking lot, basically somewhere in the way of this hypothetical girl and her hypothetical car. And all these hypothetical things met each other in a most unfortunate way, such that the hypothetical girl's beloved vehicle gave itself a rather significant boo boo on the bumper and she had to leave a long, lugubrious note (o.k., so maybe I made up the long, lugubrious part) for the other hypothetical person whom the other hypothetical car belonged to.
Now, you may think this is the end. But it's not. She cried a river and drowned the whole world over this next incident. You see, this hypothetical girl once was driving down the street, and before she realized it saw the surprised body of a young man rolling off her hood. She was scared, and feared for his life. So she stuck her head out the window, yelled "are you o.k.?," saw that he was not bleeding profusely, and so drove off without receiving an answer to her question. So Becky shared this with us, and we all sat there, trying to replay this image in our minds, trying hard not to laugh.
In any case, Graham Cracker, whose name will remain thus in this record until he decides what his real name is, kindly informed Becky that this probably means that she'll be heading south on judgement day. Not much more than two minutes later, he postulated that this could have been the best thing she ever did, since if she had stopped, she would have been sued for all she's worth, and their family would be on the street and she'd be groveling about in trash cans instead of going to college with us. At this Becky became very confused, and rightly entreated Graham Cracker that he not be so extreme in opposite directions. All in all, I think we successfully put her fears and worries to rest based on the fact that repentance is possible.
So we had a great conversation. Needless to say we are all better people because of it. I hope one day she'll realize what a good example of what not to do she is. Don't get married in a week, don't hit pedestrians and run. She also had this very important insight while we were sitting there talking--said she, "my feet reek."
So the moral of the story is, always carry a tape recorder with you just in case you think you may have an interesting conversation. I think I'll do that next time.
So Becky and I were sitting there, along with her lovely roommates, and we got to talking about life, the universe, and pretty much everything. In the course of this discussion, Becky suddenly started talking (no one knows why--maybe because we're going to be in Vegas this weekend for the BYU game) about Vegas marriages. And I quote: "I wonder if there is any problem with getting married for a weekend, not doing anything about it, and then getting it annulled a week later??" So maybe it's a loose quote, but the meaning was all the same in her words. She continued to pontificate on the topic for a while (much to our amazement) and we even had to have Chelsea call her mother to get an authoritative statement on the legitimacy of a weekend or week long marriage by an Elvis impersonator. Needless to say, I think my cheeks were sore before too long.
A bit later, we drifted away from the topic of marriage (which, I assure you, I am fully under-qualified in...but if you are female and have questions, I am always willing to discuss it. I have applications available in my office. This is the meaning of the word facetious) and soon found ourselves enjoying pleasant conversation yet again. Until suddenly Becky began to share with us the greatest tragedy of the semester thus far. Hypothetically speaking, (in order to protect the feelings and well-being of the persons involved) there was a girl that had a nice new car, which she loved like her own child (which she doesn't have yet). Also hypothetically speaking, there was another car somewhere on the street or parking lot, basically somewhere in the way of this hypothetical girl and her hypothetical car. And all these hypothetical things met each other in a most unfortunate way, such that the hypothetical girl's beloved vehicle gave itself a rather significant boo boo on the bumper and she had to leave a long, lugubrious note (o.k., so maybe I made up the long, lugubrious part) for the other hypothetical person whom the other hypothetical car belonged to.
Now, you may think this is the end. But it's not. She cried a river and drowned the whole world over this next incident. You see, this hypothetical girl once was driving down the street, and before she realized it saw the surprised body of a young man rolling off her hood. She was scared, and feared for his life. So she stuck her head out the window, yelled "are you o.k.?," saw that he was not bleeding profusely, and so drove off without receiving an answer to her question. So Becky shared this with us, and we all sat there, trying to replay this image in our minds, trying hard not to laugh.
In any case, Graham Cracker, whose name will remain thus in this record until he decides what his real name is, kindly informed Becky that this probably means that she'll be heading south on judgement day. Not much more than two minutes later, he postulated that this could have been the best thing she ever did, since if she had stopped, she would have been sued for all she's worth, and their family would be on the street and she'd be groveling about in trash cans instead of going to college with us. At this Becky became very confused, and rightly entreated Graham Cracker that he not be so extreme in opposite directions. All in all, I think we successfully put her fears and worries to rest based on the fact that repentance is possible.
So we had a great conversation. Needless to say we are all better people because of it. I hope one day she'll realize what a good example of what not to do she is. Don't get married in a week, don't hit pedestrians and run. She also had this very important insight while we were sitting there talking--said she, "my feet reek."
So the moral of the story is, always carry a tape recorder with you just in case you think you may have an interesting conversation. I think I'll do that next time.
Notable Quote
This was the best pearl of wisdom I've received all day. Enjoy.
"[B-Rob], one of these days you're going to get hurt, and you're going to say that it's going to grow back, and it won't!"
(Mikifi)
(Mikifi)
Hardcore
I feel very hardcore today. It was hat day at work. Not just any hat day, but crazy hat day. So I wore my beanie. It's the only hat I have, actually. To make it crazy I stuck my pen in the side against my ear.
This causes a problem, though--I have to wear it all day long, since I am self conscious and I don't want to have everyone looking at my pressed and messy hair after I take off the beanie. It looks like I'll be wearing this beanie all over the place tonight. I wonder if they allow beanies at the intramural volleyball games--although I'm not sure if I'll have time for the game tonight since I still have a test to study for, several hours of both organ and carillon practicing to do, and a computer science lab is due tomorrow, on which I have made approximately no progress. Life is pretty simple.
Well, that being said, maybe I should move on. This was a good day. I only wish that I were a bit blacker on the outside to reflect my inner self more accurately.
This causes a problem, though--I have to wear it all day long, since I am self conscious and I don't want to have everyone looking at my pressed and messy hair after I take off the beanie. It looks like I'll be wearing this beanie all over the place tonight. I wonder if they allow beanies at the intramural volleyball games--although I'm not sure if I'll have time for the game tonight since I still have a test to study for, several hours of both organ and carillon practicing to do, and a computer science lab is due tomorrow, on which I have made approximately no progress. Life is pretty simple.
Well, that being said, maybe I should move on. This was a good day. I only wish that I were a bit blacker on the outside to reflect my inner self more accurately.
Tuesday, October 9
Notable Quote...and then some!
So, apparently I've forgotten to post one of the most important quotes by yours truly, and I've now had it requested multiple times, and my very person has been threatened in the case that I don't post it, although I find it morally unsound...
"So choosing the right is all about perspective, then?!?"
(Jenny)
"Yeah.......I mean, no!"
(Yours truly)
(Jenny)
"Yeah.......I mean, no!"
(Yours truly)
Also, I am sure there are other things that I was going to post. I can't remember now, though, so it'll have to wait. I should be doing homework, but I'm not. I am a bad boy. Consider that my confession...on with the rest of the repentance process....I can do it....yes, I can......
Sunday, October 7
Notable Quote
"[Xister] and I are going to go live in a monastery, and you can come visit us if you want."
(Bran Muffin)
(Bran Muffin)
Thursday, October 4
Peace
I feel quite peaceful and rested at the moment, and just thought I'd post that for all to see. I've just finished my D&C homework, and I had a good organ lesson this morning. I don't have much else to look forward to for the rest of the day, but I have decided that in life it's best to just roll with the punches. There is dinner group later on, at least--I can always look forward to food.
Tuesday, October 2
Thoughts
Sometimes I wonder what's going through people's minds. For example, at work this afternoon I was helping a CES employee fix up her Microsoft Outlook so that it would let her send emails--for some strange reason all she could do was receive them. In the course of my intelligent troubleshooting (which ultimately did fix the problem, thank you very much--and you thought it was a joke!) she asked if we wear headsets at the GSD. "Yeah..." Of course we do.
Later I realized what a funny question that was for her to ask. Why would it matter to her that we wear headsets? Then I suddenly thought of all the possibilities; she could have been plotting a terrorist attack which involved killing off computer technicians around the world by systematically poisoning the earpieces on their headsets...or maybe she just felt like it would make me sound cooler and smarter if she envisioned me with a headset. Maybe it gave her a sense of security knowing that not only could I fix computers, but I can do it hands-free.
I also have a theory that people's driving habits are similar, in some cases, to their walking habits. One day I am sure that in the big cities of the world such as New York or San Francisco, there will be lanes painted on the sidewalk with bright paints, and we might even be required in some places to wear a funny backpack thing with blinkers and brake lights. That would make life so much easier for those of us who just like to get places fast--the 'talkers' could just pull off onto the shoulder and talk, while the rest of us breeze by, and if you're lucky there might even be a wide sidewalk with a fast lane on it so you could really scoot along. The only problem is brakes--the best solution I think to indicate you're slowing down is to tilt your head back, and have the brake lights come on whenever your neck bends backward.
I do admit that this would be awkward in any visits made to third-world countries, where they most likely would not be up to speed with this new way of life. And there we would be, walking around making bike signals and leaning our heads back for no apparent reason. At least we'll get some good home videos out of it.
Later I realized what a funny question that was for her to ask. Why would it matter to her that we wear headsets? Then I suddenly thought of all the possibilities; she could have been plotting a terrorist attack which involved killing off computer technicians around the world by systematically poisoning the earpieces on their headsets...or maybe she just felt like it would make me sound cooler and smarter if she envisioned me with a headset. Maybe it gave her a sense of security knowing that not only could I fix computers, but I can do it hands-free.
I also have a theory that people's driving habits are similar, in some cases, to their walking habits. One day I am sure that in the big cities of the world such as New York or San Francisco, there will be lanes painted on the sidewalk with bright paints, and we might even be required in some places to wear a funny backpack thing with blinkers and brake lights. That would make life so much easier for those of us who just like to get places fast--the 'talkers' could just pull off onto the shoulder and talk, while the rest of us breeze by, and if you're lucky there might even be a wide sidewalk with a fast lane on it so you could really scoot along. The only problem is brakes--the best solution I think to indicate you're slowing down is to tilt your head back, and have the brake lights come on whenever your neck bends backward.
I do admit that this would be awkward in any visits made to third-world countries, where they most likely would not be up to speed with this new way of life. And there we would be, walking around making bike signals and leaning our heads back for no apparent reason. At least we'll get some good home videos out of it.
Monday, October 1
Tradition
Wow, I just found this old post that I must've not clicked the button for. I composed this on the eve of October...that has a fun ring to it. Maybe I should be an author someday.
I feel like I should have some sort of momentous tradition for the end of a month and the beginning of a new one, somewhat akin to the fact that wolves howl at a full moon. I'm not quite sure why I have this instinct.
There really isn't much that I can think of that would be good, though--I'm fairly sure that not many people really spend much time worrying about the passage into a new month, except to change the date on their paperwork.
Maybe someday I'll have something more worthwhile to post. This is all I've got for now.
I feel like I should have some sort of momentous tradition for the end of a month and the beginning of a new one, somewhat akin to the fact that wolves howl at a full moon. I'm not quite sure why I have this instinct.
There really isn't much that I can think of that would be good, though--I'm fairly sure that not many people really spend much time worrying about the passage into a new month, except to change the date on their paperwork.
Maybe someday I'll have something more worthwhile to post. This is all I've got for now.
Notable Quote
We had Sunday dinner with Xister and his family this evening, and it was rather pleasant. We had an interesting conversation amongst ourselves as roommates afterwards, as well. At one point Bran Muffin spouted out something fun...just like he usually does.
"It's awkward that you ruin our lives."
He was referring to D.C., our Ohio roommate, who got a girlfriend and we have concluded that for this reason alone, girls have stopped visiting us at our apartment. Along with the fact that we are the designated local homeless shelter lately. That's all.
He was referring to D.C., our Ohio roommate, who got a girlfriend and we have concluded that for this reason alone, girls have stopped visiting us at our apartment. Along with the fact that we are the designated local homeless shelter lately. That's all.
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